Embrace Reality: Avoiding the Trap of Unrealistic Expectations
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Yogis often remind us of a simple yet profound truth:
What you can do, you can do. What you cannot do, you cannot do.
This statement, though seemingly straightforward, encapsulates significant wisdom. In today's world, we find ourselves in an environment filled with relentless competition, where every sector is crowded and innovation is scarce.
The last century witnessed dramatic changes, particularly in Europe, where the shift from communism to capitalism led to unprecedented opportunities for wealth accumulation, particularly in real estate. During those times, the idea of starting a simple venture could lead to substantial success due to minimal competition.
In contrast, the current marketplace is highly standardized, making it increasingly challenging to introduce something novel. The rise of the Internet has further leveled the playing field, rendering geographical origin less significant as we become part of a vast global network with nearly boundless access to information.
We Live in Extraordinary Times
It's undeniable that we inhabit remarkable times, filled with opportunities that were unimaginable in the past. Today, basic survival needs like food and shelter are often taken for granted in developed nations.
A few decades ago, expressing individual thoughts could lead to dire consequences, especially in authoritarian regimes. Historically, dissent against authority could result in severe repercussions, whether it be exile or worse.
Moreover, past generations toiled tirelessly to meet their fundamental needs. A farmer using rudimentary tools could hardly find the time or energy to contemplate or form opinions.
Now, thanks to modern technology and communication, we can voice our thoughts freely and critique those in power. This newfound freedom allows us to engage in discussions that were once deemed too risky. With advancements in travel and technology, our work has become more manageable, granting us more time and resources to pursue personal growth and unique perspectives.
The Double-Edged Sword of Abundant Choices
While the vast array of choices may seem ideal, it can also lead to confusion. With so many options available, it becomes challenging to determine the right path to take.
Previously, one's social status was often predetermined by birth, with few opportunities for change. To become a journalist or a publicist, one typically needed formal education and connections. Nowadays, platforms like Twitter and Medium allow anyone to voice their opinions, regardless of qualifications, resulting in a competitive environment that evaluates individuals based on merit.
Are We Truly Limitless?
Despite the freedoms we now possess, limitations still exist. Each individual is born into a specific environment, receiving education and cultural influences that shape their identity. While we have the freedom to choose, certain aspects of our existence remain fixed.
In this boundless landscape of opportunities, we must recognize our unique traits and potential. For instance, while a tall person might excel in basketball, a shorter individual may need to explore other avenues. Each of us possesses a unique genetic makeup that influences our capabilities.
Instead of fostering unrealistic expectations, it's crucial to focus on our strengths. The modern narrative of self-improvement often gets misinterpreted, leading individuals to waste time chasing unattainable ideals.
We can indeed change, but only within the framework of who we are. The key is to work towards becoming the best version of ourselves, rather than striving to become someone entirely different. The longer we dwell on unrealistic expectations, the more we neglect the actionable steps we can take.
Don't Squander Your Life Chasing Unrealistic Expectations
Returning to the core message of this discussion: we live in a highly competitive world, often fixated on being "better" for the sake of status, wealth, and pleasure. This relentless pursuit can overshadow the joy of simply engaging in activities we love.
It is perplexing that we become so engrossed in the competition that we lose sight of our primary needs. This drive often leads us to fixate on future outcomes, neglecting the present moment. We may find ourselves saying, "Once I achieve this, I will finally be happy." As the Buddha wisely stated:
Be where you are. Otherwise you will miss your life.
If results are our sole focus, we risk rendering our efforts meaningless. The journey, learning, and experiences we encounter comprise the essence of life—success is merely a fleeting moment. By adopting this mindset, we may inadvertently agree to spend most of our lives feeling unfulfilled.
Finding Balance Amidst Expectations
To navigate the sea of expectations, it is vital to remain present and accept:
Whatever you can do, you can do. What you cannot do, you cannot do.
The most beneficial action we can take is to care for our immediate surroundings. If everyone focused on this, the world would transform remarkably. Instead, many drift through life, lost in thoughts and aspirations, neglecting the here and now.
As Robert Frost aptly put it:
In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.
Life continues, regardless of our distractions. Challenges accumulate, becoming increasingly daunting if we avoid addressing them.
This article aims not to instruct but to share insights drawn from personal experiences. At 24, I relocated to a new city, experiencing the thrill of endless possibilities. Yet, I found myself grappling with solitude and escaping into fantasies rather than confronting reality. Eventually, I had to ground myself in the present.
Eastern philosophies, particularly yoga, guided me to understand:
You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. — Marcus Aurelius
Instead of chasing lofty dreams, we should adapt to life as it unfolds. While we cannot control external circumstances, we can govern our reactions to them.
While none of us can alter the course of the earth or change day into night, we can commit to daily actions that align with our aspirations. For instance, aspiring writers should write daily, refining their skills and waiting for their moment to shine.
Rather than fixating on expectations tied to our careers, we should cultivate a lifestyle that values the process itself. We cannot predict when success will come, but we can prepare ourselves for it.
Luck is just one of the byproducts of those who take the most action. — Grant Cardone
Our responses to life's situations define our experiences. To effect change, we must be proactive and engaged. Holding onto unrealistic expectations will not alter our circumstances; only action can do that.
By internalizing the wisdom at the heart of this discussion, we can sharpen our focus. We must concentrate on what we can achieve right now and let go of what is beyond our reach.
Many successful individuals embody this mindset, constantly moving forward, engaging in diverse projects, and living intensely in the moment. Conversely, those mired in unrealistic expectations may find themselves paralyzed, unable to initiate their goals.
So, if you have the capability to act, do so. And if you encounter barriers, pivot to something achievable rather than lamenting over unattainable dreams.
Life is not confined to moments of success or admiration; it exists in the here and now. We should strive to be present and take action instead of wasting our time on unrealistic expectations about the future.
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