The Most Terrible Music You'll Ever Encounter

This is quite possibly the most absurd music I have ever come across.

I'm referring to the album Philosophy of the World by The Shaggs, which was recorded in 1969 in a single day, funded by the father of the three sisters in the band.

What was going through his mind? The group exhibits absolutely no musical skill. The end result resembles recordings made by individuals in a mental institution, each isolated in their own room.

None of the performers are in sync with each other, either in pitch or timing. To make matters worse, the lyrics appear to be penned by a deranged five-year-old.

Only 1,000 copies of this album were produced, and 900 of them mysteriously disappeared from the storage facility.

The "Songs"

The "music" from this album can be found on YouTube. I've linked each track individually below.

Prepare yourself, as this is pure nonsense. Your ears may resent you for the remainder of the day.

Philosophy of the World

The album opens with its titular track, which sets the tone for what's to come. The guitars are out of tune, and they strum chords at a different speed than the drums. The poorly delivered vocals proclaim:

> All the rich people want what the poor people’s got > And the poor people want what the rich people’s got > And the skinny people want what the fat people’s got > And the fat people want what the skinny people’s got

That Little Sports Car

The initial moments of this track may trick you into thinking it’s more harmonized and rhythmic. However, it quickly devolves into the same level of chaos as the first.

This song seems to discuss a man driving a sports car, with some mention of an oyster? And apparently, following him feels like being on a roller coaster?

Who Are Parents?

How many tempos, time signatures, and keys does this "song" encompass? It feels like all of them!

This track reflects on how parents are the ones who genuinely care. It's unfortunate that their father didn't care about the ears of those subjected to this madness.

My Pal Foot Foot

This sounds akin to overly excited children who have just been handed musical instruments for the first time.

The lyrics roughly go like this:

> My pal’s name is Foot Foot > He always likes to thump (?) > My pal’s name is Foot Foot > I never find him home > I go to his house > Knock at his door > People come out and say “Foot Foot don’t live here no more”

My Companion

Here, they don't even make an effort to play proper chords, and the drummer sounds like she recorded her part immediately after being jolted awake from a bizarre dream.

I’m So Happy When You’re Near

A profound song about someone they cherish. When that person is around, they feel joy. When that person is absent, they feel sadness.

That person probably left to escape the unbearable noise.

However, at 1:26, they have a moment of clarity as they "sing":

> Sometimes I think we are completely insane

Things I Wonder

There might have been a fleeting moment where the drums matched the guitars. But this was likely accidental.

This song expresses various curiosities about life: the stars, the birds, love, sorrow, and goodbyes.

Yet, they seem oblivious to the question of their ability to play their instruments.

Sweet Thing

The beginning features some somewhat decent-sounding chords, but within 19 seconds, it devolves back into the same discordant noise with off-beat drums.

It’s Halloween

In this track, they inform us that it’s Halloween and:

> All the kids are happy and gay > There doesn’t seem to be a cloud in their way > But when it’s over > And they’ve had all their fun > They’d wish that Halloween had just begun

I can’t catch all of the next part, but it appears they mention:

> Oh, there are witches > Goblins > Vampires > ?????? > Frankinsteins and zombies > And there are tramps > Cinderella (?) > Angels and gypsies

Why Do I Feel?

In this track, the opening lines sound like:

> Sometimes I feel funny and cuddled up inside (?) > Therefore some big gun (?) > I’ve just got to fly

What Should I Do?

> What should I do? > What should I do? > Tell me > Tell me > What should I do?

PLEASE STOP PLAYING!

> He’s a sad boy > He’s a bad boy > He never gives me any joy

He’s probably tired of your dreadful music!

We Have a Savior

To me, this sounds like they are saying:

> Why does the world go on, Owen? > Why does everyone bike more and more? > Don’t they know we have a savior? > All we have to do is believe and pray

> Why must we go on breathing? > Why does anyone have to cry? > Don’t they know we have a savior? > Just look up toward the sky

BONUS: My Pal Foot Foot (Live 2017)

Sadly, the drummer passed away in 2006, but here are the remaining two performing My Pal Foot Foot in 2017:

What do you think?

Were they intentionally playing poorly for amusement?

Did they genuinely believe they were talented?

Or perhaps they were unaware of their lack of ability, with their father pushing them into this because he longed for success for them?

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